In our commit-to-the-program world, people often insist on all-or-nothing. It’s a great sales tool but an unbalanced and perilous proposition, leaving no room for slip-ups, evolving priorities, unexpected challenges or appropriate course adjustments.

Every influencer, revolutionary, pauper, prophet and politician—every soul—is human. Every human makes mistakes. Consequently, every offering from every individual, including the best offer from the best person, is still imperfect. That’s okay. 

If a messenger’s imperfection negated the message, we’d have nothing. If a single imperfect message negated the messenger, we’d have no one. We have to embrace truth, sometimes uncomfortable truth, while letting the imperfections of the message or messenger fall away.

Intolerance uses sweeping judgements and labels to broker all-or-nothing propositions. Bigotry demands everyone receive the same messages from the same messengers in the same way. Blind devotion abdicates personal discernment, agency and responsibility—the very things we are here to learn and practice.

We don’t have to accept or reject messages or messengers in their totality. Most steps in our authentic path are not all-or-nothing propositions. We are all different and each is endowed with the divine tools to embrace what serves them.

Contrary to popular opinion, marriage is not an all-or-nothing proposition. You can wholly commit to your spouse and marriage—I’ve been married to the same woman for 35 years—without accepting or condoning everything your spouse does, says or believes, or them accepting or condoning everything you do, say or believe. 

Interestingly, Christ likened himself to a bridegroom, and his relationship with us to a marriage. Even if he is perfect, our understanding and perceptions of him are not. Religion and its perspectives of Christ have evolved over the centuries and will continue to do so. One can be fully committed to Christ and Christianity without condoning or accepting everything a particular religion teaches or asserts about Christ. So too with other faith traditions and their assertions about God/Source/Spirit/Creator.

Many believe Christ was perfect and his message a perfect all-or-nothing proposition. Without debating that assertion, it is notable that Christ and his message, as taught by the world, came through disciples, prophets, translators and scribes, all of whom were human. Even if his message was perfect, those who preach it are not. Despite their best intentions, imperfect people offer imperfect messages. Paul the apostle, one of Christ’s most ardent advocates, wrote, “Quench not the Spirit. Despise not prophesyings. Prove all things; hold fast that which is good” (1 Thessalonians 5:19-21).

Accept the good in people, even when they make mistakes. Receive the good in their well-intended messages, even if they occasionally say something you disagree with. Look past their missteps. Don’t throw out the entire philosophy, religion, belief system or faith. Do as Paul suggested; connect with Spirit, receive the message, test all things and hold fast to that which is good.

Ultimately, what we must accept is ourselves, even as we naively labor to become “better.” We don’t actually become better. We can’t. We are already everything. What we become is more aware of who we are and more aligned with our divine nature.  

Perhaps, if we practice tolerance toward others, holding fast to that which is good, they will do the same for us. Then we can all learn from one another.